Two nights ago in a panic, I fled to my Bible.
Fed up with my circumstances, sick of feeling stuck, I cried out to God, “I WANT OUT!”
I didn’t want to worship, I didn’t want to pray. I just wanted out.
But where would I go if not to Him?
Over the years, I’ve had to stop relying on my own understanding of life to follow Jesus; letting go of things and submitting to Him the best I knew how.
I didn’t realize I was tired of feeling stuck, being broke, scrimping and saving, and keeping an eye on the gas hand every time I got behind the wheel. I was tired of having to borrow a little here and a little there “…just till the check comes.” I was tired of prices going up and up; and walking into my favorite coffee shop to find they’d raised their prices. Again.
Lots of little reminders that I was still stuck, still struggling and still broke. 😢
“God,” I said.
“I WANT OUT!”
Have you ever felt like you just wanted out of your circumstances?
You see what’s going on in the world and the world around you, and your heart begins to yearn for an escape route?
Do you find yourself longing for life to be good again?
I was tired. But at the same time so grateful for the growth and maturity taking place all around me.
So in a fit of frustration, I grabbed for my Bible, opened it somewhere in the middle, and landed on this passage in Psalm 103:
”Let all that I am praise the Lord;
with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name.
Let all that I am praise the Lord;
may I never forget the good things he does for me.”
“He forgives all my sins
and heals all my diseases.
He redeems me from death
and crowns me with love and tender mercies.
He fills my life with good things.
My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!” Psalms 103:1-5
Knowing it wasn’t by chance, I cried and read this with the awareness that God was speaking to my heart.
Why then was my soul so deeply dissatisfied? Famished and desperate for something…
What was it so hungry for?
God surprised me the next morning with His answer, by waking me up to this song:
Nothing in this world will satisfy, Jesus you’re the cup that won’t run dry.
There’s a place of refuge found in the presence of God.
I was frustrated, angry and confused, but God knew where I needed to be. With Jesus; being refreshed as I rested in His presence.
But as for me, it is good for me to draw near to God; I have made the Lord GOD my refuge and placed my trust in Him, That I may tell of all Your works. Psalm 73:28 AMP
Jesus is the life-giver, reviving our very souls; the best place of refuge I know.
Nothing will refresh and comfort our hearts like the Lord – not binging that series, or downing that second helping. Jesus is our strength and comfort, and by His power alone we endure.
And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace. Of the greatness of his government and peace there will be no end. -Isaiah 9:6
But what blows my mind the most about Him, is that He is always present.
He’s always so near, friend.
Jesus is so close and so ready to engage with you. He is your safe space, poised and willing to hear the prayers of a desperate, thirsty soul.
I would encourage you not to give up, and not to complain, but to sit with Him and let Jesus refresh your soul, giving you the strength, joy, and patience to endure.
Be blessed and encouraged.
Psalm 103
Let all that I am praise the Lord;
with my whole heart, I will praise his holy name.
2 Let all that I am praise the Lord;
may I never forget the good things he does for me.
3 He forgives all my sins
and heals all my diseases.
4 He redeems me from death
and crowns me with love and tender mercies.
5 He fills my life with good things.
My youth is renewed like the eagle’s!
6 The Lord gives righteousness
and justice to all who are treated unfairly.
7 He revealed his character to Moses
and his deeds to the people of Israel.
8 The Lord is compassionate and merciful,
slow to get angry and filled with unfailing love.
9 He will not constantly accuse us,
nor remain angry forever.
10 He does not punish us for all our sins;
he does not deal harshly with us, as we deserve.
11 For his unfailing love toward those who fear him
is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.
12 He has removed our sins as far from us
as the east is from the west.
13 The Lord is like a father to his children,
tender and compassionate to those who fear him.
14 For he knows how weak we are;
he remembers we are only dust.
15 Our days on earth are like grass;
like wildflowers, we bloom and die.
16 The wind blows, and we are gone—
as though we had never been here.
17 But the love of the Lord remains forever
with those who fear him.
His salvation extends to the children’s children
18 of those who are faithful to his covenant,
of those who obey his commandments!
19 The Lord has made the heavens his throne;
from there he rules over everything.
20 Praise the Lord, you angels,
you mighty ones who carry out his plans,
listening for each of his commands.
21 Yes, praise the Lord, you armies of angels
who serve him and do his will!
22 Praise the Lord, everything he has created,
everything in all his kingdom.
Let all that I am praise the Lord.
*Photo credit: Nataliya Vaitkevich from Pexels.
